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심-022 Management Lesson |
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2001-07-03 00:00:00, Hit : 14414 |
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MANAGEMENT LESSONS
> >
> > Lesson Number One:
> > A crow was sitting on a tree, doing nothing all day. A small rabbit saw
> > the crow, and asked him, "Can I also sit like you and do nothing all day
> > long?"? The crow answered: "Sure, why not."? So, the rabbit sat on the
> > ground below the crow, and rested. All of a sudden, a fox appeared,
> > jumped on the rabbit and ate it.
> > Management Lesson: To be sitting and doing nothing you must be sitting
> > very, very high up.
> >
> > Lesson Number Two:
> > A little bird was flying south for the winter. It was so cold, the bird
> > froze and fell to the ground in a large field. While it was lying there
a
> > cow came by and dropped some dung on it. As the frozen bird lay there
in
> > the pile of cow dung, it began to realize how warm it was. The dung was
> > actually thawing him out! He lay there all warm and happy, and soon
began
> > to sing for joy. A passing cat heard the bird singing and came to
> > investigate.
> > Following the sound, the cat discovered the bird under the pile of cow
> > dung, and promptly ate him!
> > Management Lessons:
> > 1) Not everyone who drops shit on you is your enemy.
> > 2) Not everyone who gets you out of shit is your friend.
> > 3) And when you're in deep shit, keep your mouth shut!
> >
> > Lesson Number Three:
> > When the body was first made, all the parts wanted to be Boss.? The
brain
> > said, "I should be Boss because I control the whole body's responses and
> > functions?" The feet said, "We should be Boss as we carry the Boss
around
> > and get him to where he wants to go?" The hands said, "We should be the
> > Boss because we do all the work and earn all the money?" And so it went
> > on and on with the heart, the lungs and the eyes until finally the
asshole
> > spoke up. Al the parts laughed at the idea of the asshole being the
Boss.
> > So the asshole went on strike, blocked itself up and refused to work.
> > Within a short time the eyes became crossed, the hands clenched, the
feet
> > twitched, the heart and lungs began to panic and the brain fevered.
> > Eventually the all decided that the asshole should be the Boss, so the
> > motion was passed.? All the other parts did all the work while the Boss
> > just sat and passed out the shit!
> > Management Lesson:
> > You don't need brains to be a Boss - any asshole will do.
> >
> > Lesson Number Four:
> > A turkey was chatting with a bull. "I would love to be able to get to
the
> > top of that tree" signed the turkey, "but I haven't got the energy."
> > "Well, why don't you nibble on some of my droppings?" replied the bull.
> > They're packed with nutrients"? The turkey pecked at a lump of dung and
> > found that it actually gave him enough strength to reach the first
branch
> > of the tree. The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached the
> > second branch. Finally, after a fortnight, there he was proudly
perched
> > at the top of the tree. Soon? he was promptly spotted by a farmer, who
> > shot the turkey out of the tree.
> > Management Lesson:
> > Bullshit might get you to the top, but it won't keep you there.
> >
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